J and I were going to see a movie last night, but he called me about 6 to explain that he had double-booked himself and asked if it be ok if we waited until 8 to hang out. Of course my paranoid mind ran rampant, thinking, he has another date! Good thing I kept my trap shut, because his plans were with his best friend, who was coming over to J’s until it was time to meet up with his girlfriend.

So, J came over about 8, bearing food … he brought a steak, a package of chicken breasts and an array of seasonings. He cooked the food … I ate a small piece of steak; he made the chicken too salty for me … and he ate the rest. The boy can pack away the food. He didn’t take any benadryl before he came over and although I gave him an antihistamine when he arrived, within 20 minutes he was sneezing and it was kind of downhill from there.

It was pretty clear that he wouldn’t be able to last through a movie in my cat-filled apartment, so we cleaned up and decided to head over to his place. He wanted to actually see the cats — why, I don’t know … although it could have been a ploy to see my bedroom — so I opened the bedroom door. A light was on in there; I turned it off and when I turned around, J was PETTING Mr. Man. Srsly. Then he wasn’t even going to wash his hands. OMG.

Once we got to J’s apartment, he made me coffee with his French press … but he didn’t have any milk or sweetener. Ummm. Ok. I know I made a terrible face when I tasted it because, even know, I like my coffee all fancified. I heat and whip up skim milk to make the coffee into a latte, add a few packets of Splenda and often sugar-free flavored syrup. A far cry from black joe.

Anyway, we watched the rest of CSI and snuggled on the couch. J commented that I was very easy to watch TV with and I had to agree that I liked watching TV with him. At one point, I was lying down on the couch, with my head in his lap (his idea, although I told him I better not get poked in the eye ), when, out of nowhere, he said, “I could take your panties off with my teeth.”

I *know* my head shot up and I said, “WHAT did you say?” He blushed and said, “I didn’t mean to say that out loud.” LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL I could NOT stop laughing LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL Even the dog wandered over to see what was going on.

So, yeah, another good evening and another fun sleepover. I slept fairly well this time, much better than the other two times. We woke up when my alarm went off at 6:30 … but it was after 7 by the time I got outta there. He walked me home and gave me a kiss by my front door. *swoon*

HE IS SO ADORABLE!!!

Oh, this was another cute moment. He wanted to see the courses that I write/maintain for work so I pulled up a few. The first one was one that I did narration on a few years ago. It’s about financial topics, ok. Nothing exciting. He sat, rapt, listening to me, and suddenly exclaimed, “God, Monique, that is so sexy!” I was like, seriously?! and he said, “Hell, yes, you sound amazing!” *swoon*

Oh, Lordy. I took extra allergy medicine today and I am still sniffling and sneezing up a storm. My eyes are itchy, my head kinda hurts, my throat is sore. BAH. No me likey!

I went to the doctor today to discuss my birth control options — taking the Pill every day is just too much of a pain in the ass. Srsly. I don’t know why. Maybe it’s a little rebellion, considering all of the vitamins I have to take on a daily basis. But, I’m back on the Nuva Ring. At least I only have to think of that twice a month … pop it in and then 3 weeks later, it comes out.

While I was there, the dr had me hop up on the exam table since he hadn’t seen me since my surgery. He basically just wanted to listen to my lungs but he also checked the glands in my throat as well as took a peek at my ears and throat. He didn’t really like what he saw. Ever since the epic tonsillitis of ‘06, I feel like he’s basically been waiting for it to come back. But I’ll be damned if after he asked how swallowing had been for me that it felt strange. UGH. Part of the reason the tonsillitis was so bad before was that I let it go, thinking it was allergies. So, he made me promise to call his office on Friday if I still felt iffy … I suppose that means another round of shots in the ass. I still remember those bruises! Yeouch.

I’m going to a movie with J tomorrow night, assuming I’m not sick. I don’t know if he didn’t get my VM the other night or what; I’ll ask him about that tomorrow … but last night he sent me a text asking if I wanted to see him again sometime soon and suggested another movie date. I was a bit crabby, so instead of replying with a “Srsly? You’re asking me out via text? SRSLY?” I wisely vented via email to Laci and waited until this morning to text J back … which I did with a very pleasant “Sure :)” We can discuss the relative merits of texting vs calling over dinner. OH and I PROMISE I will do my very best to get a photo of him. So if there’s a private post up tomorrow, that’s why.

I am feeling very meh tonight. I’m tired, stressed from work and school, and also PMS-ing. I am *really* missing comfort food. If I had not had this surgery, I’d most likely be stuffing my piehole with jelly bellys or something similar. Now I must actually identify and work through my feelings. Bah! What’s the fun in that?

It’s been 3 months since my surgery so of course I took photos. If you’re friends with me on MySpace or Crackbook, they’re posted there, but here is one where you can see a big difference. This surgery is the BEST thing I could have done for myself!

I am currently obsessed with “Come On Get Higher” by Matt Nathanson. Can’t get enough of that song! I’m not sure what exactly about it appeals to me, but I have it looping on my laptop.

Where did this weekend disappear to? Today was definitely a Monday … slow yet fast-paced, busy but draggy … bah. I spent all morning basically working out of my in-box. Seemed like one thing after another popped up. At least I got some work done in the afternoon.

I started my work for my accounting class. Whiskey. Tango. Foxtrot. This is going to be a long 8 weeks. Sigh.

I conked out fairly early last night and woke up to a lovely good night message from J. I saw him on my way home tonight — he was out with the dog — but he was too far down the side street for me to yell … and I wasn’t about to honk. Not in my neighborhood. LOL I called him tonight to invite him over for din-din either tomorrow or Wednesday, but ended up leaving a VM. He’s most likely out watching MNF … it’s the Colts, too. I could have watched but yeah, that accounting homework.

What a day. I got home about 8:30 a.m. and spent most of the morning swooning. :-p I did run out to do some errands and grab some lunch, and also took a nap about noon. I was starting to crash and had a small window of opportunity before Laci and Sodapop arrived. It was a good thing I did nap, as we were on the go for about 7 hours. Sodapop got her hair cut, then she and Laci had their tarot cards read while I waited (last week’s reading was enough for me!). I’ll let them tell you what the psychics said. :p We ate a yummy dinner, then went to the mall to wander around. On our way out, we ran into my friend Debby and her husband, and I chatted with them for a while. Busy!

While we were waiting at Sodapop’s hair appointment, I played one of J’s voice mails for Laci; even she, as a Texas girl, was giggling at his accent. J swears that it’s nothing compared to what it was a year ago and that he hardly has an accent. Pfft. Last night, as soon as someone asked him where he was from and he replied “Hu-stun,” the ladies at my table swooned.

He insists that if he takes some allergy meds, he can come over to my place, were I interested in inviting him. Last time he took 2 pills and was wheezing after 3 hours. He said that if he were to take 3, he might even be able to spend the night. I said, “Ah … there’s the problem. When you were over before, all of the cat things were in the bedroom. That’s no good.” His smooth reply was that he would not be so presumptuous as to assume that he would be in the bedroom and that my couch seemed very comfortable. Yeah, yeah, yeah. :p Then again, knowing how possessive Mr. Man is (he’s on the bed next to me right now), the couch may be the safest place for J!

My accounting for business managers course starts tomorrow. UGH. I have a TON of reading to do … like, hundreds of pages, plus 2 assignments, so I’ll start in on that tomorrow. J has a MS in finance and I am not above asking for his help!

The other day, I asked J if he wanted to go to dinner and a play with a group of my friends and me. (Note: I have not introduced a gentleman friend to my friends in nearly THREE YEARS. And it was this guy and things did not go over well. Last I checked his MySpace, though, he’s married with a kid on the way, so snaps to him. And yeah, umm, I’m so much cuter than I was 3 years ago. What’s that about?) We had plans to meet at a local restaurant then walk down to the theater after the meal. Although I had a commitment from J, and I had purchased 2 tickets, we hadn’t worked out the details … and I was not happy. As usual, Sodapop and Laci were there to talk me down (Lucy was driving to another state, so I thoughtfully left her out of the fray :p). Alls well that ends well, though, and J ended up joining us at the end of the meal.

There were 7 of us, including him, and he sat down at the end of the table. My friend S., on her second glass of wine, loudly whispered, “HE’S CUTE, MONIQUE!” while another friend nodded enthusiastically. The friend sitting next to me slapped me on the leg to note her agreement. LOL It was interesting to watch … J immediately introduced himself to the two men in the group, who happened to be at that end of the table. Handshakes all around. Male rituals fascinate me.

Anywho, we stayed at the restaurant for a while, then wandered down to the theater, where we were going to see Evil Dead: The Musical. Oh yeah. I promised it would be full of awesomeness and I was right. 4 of us sat in the front row, while S and D hightailed it to the back, after the director warned there would be blood … I’ll have to take a photo of my blood-stained t-shirt to prove it. (It has soap in it, so it should wash out, but I’m not going to waste my time on a $5 t-shirt from Walmart!) The play was based on the Evil Dead movie and fucking rocked.

J got up at intermission to get me a water and himself a beer, and immediately, the comments started. Group consensus was that he was tres cute and very nice. I must agree.

After the play, J asked me what I wanted to do next and I asked if he wanted company for a while. His response was pretty much, “Duh.” So, we went back to his place and hung out for a while. At least for me, it was pretty much inevitable that we would end up in le sack, but we took our time getting there. And yeah … it was nice. Veryveryvery nice. I had forgotten about one major benefit of younger men … he was ready to go again quite quickly. Miss Monique was a happy girl.

I ended up spending the night. He said I didn’t seem to sleep very well; I feel pretty well-rested and hopefully that holds up. Laci and Soda are driving up here today and I don’t want to conk out on them at 8 p.m. or anything!

J is just so … I don’t even know how to describe him. Despite my best intentions at avoiding a relationship, I am most likely smitten. While we were holding hands at the play last night and, again, during the night, I was reminded of what the tarot card reader said and I thought, hmmmm … that wouldn’t be so bad …

Srsly. Sometimes I wonder how someone with a fairly decent IQ can be so lacking in other areas. It’s like I am TRYING to create drama with this situation with J. Today, I sent him a text and asked if he felt like doing something tonight. His reply: “Maybe. I’ve been eating and drink all day on my day off. ” I was, like, what the fuck is that about? I was pissed, because I haven’t seen him since Friday, and worried that my little self-fulfilling prophecy re: every relationship is a failure was going to come true.

About 7, he texted me, asking if I was home and if I could chat. I emailed Laci and said I thought he was going to end things with me. Her reply was along the lines of, why would he be so stupid? Well, I ended up talking to him for more than an hour, about all sorts of things. It was probably the best conversation we’ve had. We talked about our childhoods, past jobs, church … J and I have a lot of differences, not surprising considering I grew up in the midwest and he in a small town in Texas, but we have a lot in common, too, or at least we seem to appreciate our differences. While I was ending the conversation, he got all panicky, as he thought I was hanging up, that he wasn’t working tomorrow night and he’d call before then.

I don’t know how or why I get myself worked up like this. I am going to crawl into bed with my laptop and work some more on the mini inventory Sodapop sent me lo so many months ago. Scary stuff, to face my feelings and fears about relationships and sex. But it must be done …

Today was definitely a Monday. I overslept, nearly left my work laptop at home … somehow I made it through the day without any major disasters. About 3:30, J texted me that he gave up his evening shift so he’d be around if I wanted to call tonight. We exchanged a few flirty messages and, despite knowing that he was most likely exhausted, I called him about 7. Well, not only was he exhausted, he was drinking beer … aka no good to me.

He brought up the fortune teller, as he referred to her, again — I did mention it to him because EYE AM STEWPID but I only told him the job related stuff. He asked if she said anything about my love life. I froze. I finally said, “Hmmm you asking if she mentioned you?!” Which, of course, he totally was. I said that she asked if I was in a relationship, I said I had been seeing a guy for all of two weeks … then I told him that she, or rather the cards, said he was a good guy. He was totally fishing for more but no, I ain’t sharing the crazy town news. LOL We chatted for 10-15 minutes then he asked if he could call me right back. That was 2 hours ago. Mmhmm.

I returned some books to the library, went to UPS and then sat in the longest drive-thru line EVER at McD’s. It didn’t help that I was already cranky from not eating. Why was the line so long? It was one of those drive-thrus with two speakers to order from; a lot of the time the second one isn’t on, so you just pull forward to the first one. Well, this super smart (blonde, I’ll say it LOL) gal sat at the second one for MORE THAN FIVE MINUTES … after she watched the previous car order from the first spot. I thought there was another car there, until the car behind this chick whipped around her to order. I could see the face of Ms Smarty Pants and she was PISSED. LOLOLOL I know I said, “Fucking SERIOUSLY?!” out loud at least once … and I’m sure I wasn’t the only one.

I decided to go see a psychic today. There’s a local place that advertises often and this was one of their “psychic fair” weekends. $5 admission and $10 per 15-minute reading. The place looked a little sketchy so I texted Laci where I was and the name of the place, and let her know I’d call when I was done. Inside it was pretty basic, with several round tables set up. I paid my admission fee and purchased one reading, then wandered from table to table. A coworker had been there before but the guy who did her reading wasn’t there. I stopped at one table and decided to stay there. K dealt with tarot cards.

Holy shit.

Ok, I don’t want to get ahead of myself. First, she shuffled FOREVER and then had me cut the deck into thirds and reassemble the stacks into one pile. Then she used a spread I hadn’t seen before, using about 40 cards. She shook her head and asked if I felt like everything in my life was going wrong or was up in the air. I said, “Umm yeah kinda” lol. Like, does anyone to a place like that because their life is going well? LOL

She told me some things about work that I won’t go into; and then asked if I was in a relationship. I said I had just started seeing someone recently. K said we needed to talk more and communicate on a deeper level than what we are doing now. She said he (presumably J) was a good guy and one that will be around for a while. Basically, it’s me not knowing what I want that is holding things back. Later on, she went so far as to say that once I decide that I’m ready for a serious relationship, he’ll be there, as long as I don’t push him away, and that she could see the relationship leading to marriage. Again, she told me he was a great guy and cautioned me against “losing” him unless I was positive that’s really what I wanted.

In other news, I am my own worst enemy (no surprise there) and I’m capable of achieving quite a bit if I take a few risks. She also said many opportunities will be coming my way, professionally and personally, and I could miss out if I’m not open to them.

The reading was supposed to be 15 minutes but she went over by 5 or so. She said I’ll soon realize that my life isn’t all that bad (lol), especially compared to others. She saw a lot of hope and positivity around me. Basically, the negativity is coming from me. She also urged me to find out what it is that I really want to do with my life, as she feels that where things are aren’t where they could be.

I was really fucking freaked out when I left there, especially about the stuff about J. I called Laci and got her VM, then I called Sodapop and got HER voice mail! That did not help my anxiety. LOL While I was talking to Laci, I realized that I met J a week before my birthday, which put the timeframe still in my “6″ year … the year when I was supposed to meet someone with whom I’d have a lasting relationship. So who knows, maybe the numerologist and the tarot card lady are right … I’ll have to invite them to the wedding.

I was going to get a pedi, to chill the hell out, but they were closed, so I ended up going to the art museum. I planned to go to church but the bread I ate at Panera, along with black bean soup, didn’t set too well with me, so now I’m home. The art museum gave me time to think … and really, what would be too bad about being in an actual relationship? I have to get over my fears sooner or later and who knows, maybe J is worth it. More than one person has described me as being “smitten” so I must not be really hiding my feelings. I certainly like him more than I’ve liked anyone in a while … one day at a time, right?

It’s been a quick day. I slept in until 10 then finally got moving about 11 to go pick up my contact lenses. While I was waiting for my glasses to be adjusted (ummm all of 2 minutes), I found an orange lens case with sparkles on it, so you know I had to buy that. :p I stopped at home to feed the cats — they were TOTALLY out of food — then went to the library. I didn’t want to go home, so I went to a coffeehouse to read one of the deliciously smutty books my library always seems to have.

While I was reading, I couldn’t help but notice the eye candy: Two 20-something med students at the table next to me and three EMS managers (or so their shirts proclaimed), one of whom was painfully hawt. He totally busted me checking him out but I didn’t care. LOL Justin called while I was there and left a VM that he picked up a shift for tonight. Le sigh. I can’t fault him but whatev. Doesn’t make me happy.