My girl Snarky Cool e-mailed me tonight. She’s filing for divorce this weekend. It always bothered me when people I hardly knew would congratulate me after my divorce. I always wanted to say, what the fuck do you know about my life? Obviously I had some unresolved and misdirected anger. I just wished SC good luck. What struck me about the whole process was how easy it was. Even after 6 years of marriage, plus 3 more years of dating on top of that, because we didn’t have kids, all we had to do was fill in some blanks and sign a few documents. My heart goes out to SC. Making the right decision sometimes is never easy and then you may never know if it was the “right” decision to make.

Then this morning, when I got to my desk, I had a VM from a colleague. I knew right away something was wrong, just from the way she took a breath before she started talking. The 10 seconds or so she talked before she got to the point seemed endless. Last night, her husband was rushed to the hospital with a suspected heart attack. He’s only 46 and in terrific shape. D and I are like sisters, we know each other so well. I was in tears listening to her message. Last I talked to her, they weren’t sure if it was a heart attack; best case scenario, it was a severe anxiety attack. Regardless, she was a wreck.

This afternoon, another colleague e-mailed the results of her ultrasound … it’s a boy. I am so very happy for her; I think she’ll be a great mother. I envy her sometimes, she was so sure of her path in life and stuck to it, and it’s all worked out very well for her. Between tears of joy for her and tears of worry for D and her husband, I’m surprised I made it through the day without a full-on crying fit. But what surprised me most of all was that I felt. Despite all of the patterns that persist in my life, at least suppressing my emotions isn’t one of them.

Finally, I was updating my MySpace page and read some words I typed over a year ago. This will be my path this year when it comes to relationships and who I’m looking for: “Someone who can keep up with and challenge me. I’d even be okay with someone who is smarter than me. Maybe. Definitely someone who can make me laugh — and who laughs at my jokes. A Democrat would be nice, but I’m not holding my breath.”

Y’all got anyone who fits the bill? Sister’s getting kind of bored over here.

∗ Posted by Monique on 03.28.2007
∗ Friends, Love life, Work