when I go to the Deaf Club.”

That was an actual line in a paper I scored tonight. It now ranks as my favorite paper ever.

I wish I had a tape recorder tonight, as all sorts of crazy stuff was said tonight. For example:

The team dipshit was challenging people to five-minute “races” to see who could score the most papers. The team leader came over to me tonight and said, “You know why the ‘races’ only are five minutes? Because he can’t last longer than that!” I put my hand over my mouth in shock and howled! I couldn’t believe the team leader, this quiet guy, actually said that.

Mr. “Militia-gan” used the phrase “daisy chain” tonight, causing me to just about choke on my hard candy. The woman who sat in between us asked what that was and when neither of us would say, said she would ask her children. Yikes.

The team dipshit has an audition tomorrow to “dance seductively” for $75/hr. We were laughing that the local housewives would love him. He declared that he would be the hottest thing those women had ever seen without a shirt. The pastor-in-training said, “There’s God, Jesus and then [team dipshit] …” to which I added, “And only one will take his shirt off.”

After the team dipshit passed out his e-mail address, I handed out a few of my cute little faux business cards with my name, e-mail and phone number. The team leader — who I finally realized is a bit sweet on me — was pissy that I didn’t give him one and two of the other men asked me for one. I was like, what the hell? When did I turn into the second-job temptress? But we’ll see if any of them call …. Ha. Ha. Ha.

∗ Posted by Monique on 06.28.2006
∗ Crushes, Love life, Work