About a month after my ex moved out, he won $1,500 at a casino. I, understandably, was pissed as I didn’t see a dime of that. When it came time to do our taxes, because we still had to file jointly, he gave me all of his information and I plugged it into TurboTax, assuming I had everything I needed.

Voila, end of marriage, end of taxes.

Non.

Several weeks ago, the ex received a letter from the IRS stating we owed money still from the ‘04 tax return. A lot of it was from stock options, which are heavily taxed to begin with, but the $1,500 from the casino showed up again. He claimed he didn’t think he had to include it as income because he filled out tax paperwork then and there. I wanted to smack him through the phone; instead I said, “Well. Do you think that’s how the IRS found out about the money?” I told him he had to call the IRS to clear this up. For once he listened to me, and my logic got the stock-option crap removed from the document. The corrected version was supposed to go to him.

It came to me.

Addressed to my former name.

A name which has not been legally mine since Feb. 23, 2005. I’ve filed taxes since then, thank you very much.

But I digress.

The total amount owed, including interest, is $425. I used my somewhat-rusty algebra skills to solve for “x,” or what portion of that $425 is attributable to me. Are you ready for this? $17.91! Ha! I will gleefully write that check, knowing that he has to shell out over $400.

I, of course, have no idea how he spent his $1,500 winnings. But for some reason, one of my favorite Kid Rock lyrics just popped into my head: “Hookers and blow, that’s how I live.” “You can’t say that, Kid!” “Fuck off, I just did.” LOL

I need to remember the latest episode of his ineptness during the next lonely night, when I feel like I always will be alone and start to wonder if I really, really, really made the right decision.

Fuck, yeah, I did.

∗ Posted by Monique on 06.12.2006
∗ My life, The Ex, The past