“‘Crazy Shit My Therapist Says’ for $100, please.”

Last month, my therapist freaked me out by telling me she thought Mark was gay. She even mentioned that last week. Today, however, she completely changed her tune. After I told her about the “Thank you. For Everything.” e-mail he sent me Saturday, she asked me if I wondered what the real reason he broke up with me was. She made the point that he and I were on similar levels — he wasn’t sure of his feelings for me and I wasn’t sure of my feelings for him. I hadn’t told him I loved him, wanted to marry him, etc., She also thought it seemed out-of-character for him to break up with me suddenly, as he had been willing to talk about issues before, and it was strange that he kept making plans with me and calling me if he wanted to end things.

So her suggestion is that I, at some point, contact him to talk about what happened. Honestly, the thought of calling him or seeing him is enough to make my stomach turn. And if I write a letter, there’s no guarantee he will respond. She was even suggesting that perhaps the conversation, were it to take place, could lead to a deepening of our relationship, whether it led to a reconciliation or not.

What. The. Fuck?

I guess I can see her looking at this from a point of view of helping me, as she said there’s a lesson in here somewhere. Not to speak for Mark, of course, but he didn’t seem able to identify his feelings let alone synthesize them with mine.

I don’t know. It hasn’t even been two weeks. I’m not ready to do anything.

∗ Posted by Monique on 02.09.2006
∗ Uncategorized